Photographic Evidence

On the course...

...and at the finish!

Did I hear someone say, 'Portland'?

It is done

I am stiff, but on the mend.
Thanks, you all.
I wouldn't have done it without you.

Over in the meadow

Over in the meadow where they jog more and more
Was a sleek Mama runner and her little runners four
"Taper!" said the Mama
"We taper!" said the four
And so they tapered all day
And quit jogging more and more

Taper, bitches.

So this taper thing is kind of freaking me out. Because there just isn't much running left between now and the marathon and I'M NOT SURE I'M READY. Interestingly, or not, this has not inspired me to run more, or even as much as is prescribed. Nope. Just to freak out. A little. Maybe. Whatever.

What about you? Are you ready?

I will spare you the photographic evidence

because this is a PG-13 kind of blog, and I'm not saying it rivals the black toe of death, but I have an enormous, jewel-toned, formerly fluid-filled, but now curiously flat pustule on the side of my left foot. The beast seems to reside partly under the calloused pad of the ball of my foot, but has escaped to find freedom near my instep. It is very strange. Very strange indeed. It doesn't hurt though, so I've got that going for me. Which is nice.

The Black Toe

Step 1: Toe nail mysteriously turns completely black
Step 2: Toe nail falls off
Step 3: I dunno, but I cannot wait to find out
I am currently approaching completion of Step 2. The Black Toe is soooooo much a cooler running battle wound than chafing.

For anyone wondering

I'll just tell you that Gatorade comes in but two flavors: lemon-lime (nee - original) and about eight colors of dog poop.

Crossing over to the dark side*

18. You have to go to a special kind of place in order to run 18.











*credit: Erin Flood

You're never too old

From: http://sports.yahoo.com/top/news?slug=britmarathon030508&prov=reuters&type=lgns

Already Britain’s oldest employee, 101-year-old Buster Martin now aims to become the world’s oldest marathon runner by completing the London Marathon and celebrating with a pint of beer and a cigarette.


Sprightly and bearded, he completed a half marathon at the weekend in five hours 13 minutes. The former Army physical training instructor works three days a week for a London plumbing firm and says he has trained for the April 13th race in his spare time.

“I’ve said I’ll attempt it,” he told Reuters by telephone from his workplace at Pimlico Plumbers. “I haven’t said I’ll complete it. If I do make it, all the better. I hadn’t thought of doing it before but someone asked me and the money goes to charity so why not?”

His sponsorship money will go to the Rhys Daniels Trust, which provides temporary accommodation for families of patients in specialist children’s hospitals.

Martin, who had 17 children and returned to work at the age of 99 saying he was bored after two years of retirement, would beat the previous record for world’s oldest marathon runner by eight years.

“If I finish, I’ll do what I always do and have a pint and a fag,” he said. “People ask what is my secret but I haven’t got one. They say fags and booze are bad for you—but I’m still here, aren’t I?”

Gak

This week has been very lame for running. I felt better than usual after the long run on Sunday but since then, the running has been very sloggy, like running through Gak. Don't act like you don't know what Gak is. I've used up my wiggle week visiting Oregon, so I'll be doing my first 16 this weekend. If you already did yours, wow. Way to go. Probably you're the only one, Michelle. So you should be totally ready to accompany me this weekend for our running tour of New York bridges. Right? Right? Excellent. And then be ready for $6 beers.

Get High

Yes, Running Can Make You High

May we all feel it on May 31st.

Fishing in the Dark

I had a good 11 miler last night. I got home from Spokane later than I had hoped, decompressed for a few minutes longer than I should have which meant that I started my run later than I should have considering the location, the quickly setting sun and the absence of K-Fed. Solution: Run really fast. I lost it on the 105th hill (Kate knows the one) at the end of my run and then lay on the floor for a good 10 minutes after I got back, but it felt really good.

Does anyone else get violently cold after finishing a run? I know I used to get a little cold, but I am ridiculously cold after I run now-a-days.

Saw some interesting wild life in the ol' Columbia:

This is one of the fatties responsible for the salmon decline. Remember, place all the blame on him and none on our own excesses.



And here is one of my favorite birds; they make the coolest noise when they are flying down the Skookumchuck (or any river for that matter).

Anyone catch the NPR story on 24? Yea, me neither, but I am sure it is good and will listen to it later.


Enough delirious randomness; I am going to bed.

Ouch.

I might need a new leg when all is said and done.

No, I'm telling you.

Intervals are horrible. My butt hurts. A bone in my lower left leg seems to be gently breaking. And I blame you. I could barely squeeze out three sets at 6:58. Too fast. Thought I was gonna puke. Might have if I tried to do two more. Why did you suggest this? Why do you look all buff and slim in that picture? What color is my parachute?

I need a drink.

I'm telling you.

Intervals.

The real spirit of the marathon

It's my opinion that the real spirit of the marathon is self-deprivation and sacrifice. Purification is the end. Physical training is the means. Who among us has ever romanticized in their mind becoming a shaolin monk? The solitude; the personal thoughts and visualization during the hours spent running alone are themselves a type of meditation. The patience required for achievement. The absence of material rewards. The things we do. The things we do without. Testing physical and mental endurance. Focusing on technique and breathing. Feeding our bodies the things they need and forgoing the things which, under different circumstances, we might otherwise want. And why? Precisely because we don't have to. I do not necessarily mean that marathon training is some kind of religious experience. I mean that marathon training can be likened to a part of a monastic lifestyle. You know, the part that doesn't have to do with worship. Balance, calm, clarity and humility are still attained.

I've often thought of this modern monasticism and why it's so appealing to me, given this age of techno-ease and instant gratification. I think that it feels good to work for something, to struggle, to do without and to accomplish on your own. And make no mistake, when running a marathon, you are very much on your own. I think that part of it goes back to what Chuck Palahniuk said in 'Fight Club': "We are history's middle children...we don't have a great war in our generation, or a great depression...". If there is no common cause, no collective call to arms, then some of us are compelled to an individual one.

I think that it's more and simpler than that, though. It feels good to know oneself - what you're capable of, where your limits are and what you could really do if you really had to. That's the most practical value of so much disciplined dedication.

Accidental Overage & Death by Velcro

I knew I had gone too far when I got to Fletcher's Boathouse, but I didn't realize just how much too far. I'm glad I had some Gu on this run and some scenery I hadn't seen in a while. After a hot shower and some pizza I mounted a serious velcro gun assault on my little brothers, but was beaten, badly. I'm a much bigger target and as James was kind enough to point out, "older and slower". But I ran 12 miles this morning! All you did was go to church!

You know...

It's possible that I'm built a little sturdier than average, but at 5'9", I hardly consider myself a threatening presence. And yet...

It seems like any time that I make eye contact with someone, as often as not, they want to know what I'm "looking at" and/or what my "problem" is. I don't get it. Something about my face, I guess.

Well, not that it's anyone's business, but when I'm running I'm usually "looking at" the 180 degree field of vision ahead of me and my "problem" is that I'm tired. And really...after more than nine miles...I'm just too damn tired to stop in order to satisfy someone's curiosity.

Sheesh!

10-ish

Here was about an hour and a half of my Saturday. I need to go stretch now.

Five. The hard way.

So. I did my five yesterday, but I did it in intervals. I decided to run the 3:00 X 3:00s, which Erin referred to below. It's good in a really miserable sort of way. I do them on the treadmill. You can do them on the ground, but it takes a lot more (I think) both mentally and physically in order to push it as hard, when it's all up to you.

It breaks down like this:

Do a slow (10:00) 1 mile warm-up.

Run for three minutes for as fast as you can maintain. I jumped up to 9 miles an hour, which is a 6:40 pace. I know these things because my treadmill tells me so.

Recover for three minutes. When I'm starting out, as I was last night, I'll drop to a walk (3 miles miles an hour/20:00 minute pace). The first minute is usually spent with my hands behind my head, gasping for air. As I get into better shape, I usually tend to end up jogging during my recovery instead.

Do five sets of these, which will take 30 minutes total.

Finish with a slow (10:00) 1 mile cool down.

Last night, my workout took 50 minutes and I ran 5.06 miles.

Personally, I hate intervals. Or maybe I hate that I love them. I don't know...they are so miserable, but you kind of find yourself looking forward to next week, so that you can do them again.

If you do these, then I will tell you that they will give you a whole new perspective on running. You will use more or less the same muscles that you otherwise always use when running, only more so. You will work them harder. You will definitely know which ones you are working and when you are working them. You will surely focus on your breathing and perhaps even your form, if only in order to keep your mind off of everything else. You will suck in as much oxygen as your lungs will allow. You will exceed your VO2 max and your muscles will operate in oxygen debt. You will soak your shirt and feel the vibration of your ravenous metabolism long after you're done. You may get light headed in your last 30 seconds of each set. You may also experience tunnel vision, numbness in your lips and tingling in your fingers. I'm not trying to sound extreme, I'm just relating my experience. The benefit is that you will get fit - like athletic fit. You will work your whole body. You will feel capable and lean and strong. You will go do this now. You will not think I'm so full of myself when you are done.

Hi everyone,

I've never really blogged before- so I think that's why I've been a bit slow to add my thoughts. Michelle, I mean, Bitches, and I have been doing alright on our long runs....despite my need to throw myself on the concrete and skid for a couple of seconds. We were on a 10 mile run, and at about mile 8 or so I found myself sprawled out on the sidewalk. I got up laughing/hyperventilating and managed to finish. Afterwards I felt like I had aged about 40 years. But I got to pick out some really cool looking neon band aids that make me look really tough.

Anyone else feeling like your hamstrings are working against you, and in turn having a hard time picking up your feet? I've heard stretching is really important- maybe I need to take it up. But I have found that wool running socks rock and prevent blisters. So go pick up a pair if you're having an issue with that. Or, strip a pocket sheep...same difference.

Well, that's all I got for now. I find myself waiting to run when I'm not running. Walking almost seems like a waste of time now- this is a new feeling for me.

Back to picking out bits of road out of the right side of my body!

21 miles this week

I'm 18 runs into this thing and the hardest one yet was the 3 miles I did on Tuesday on the treadmill. Why is this? I ran 8, no problem, on Saturday. I had some lower leg "awareness" (this is my current euphemism for pain) on Sunday so I took an extra day off. I won't do that again. Two days off after the long run made the short run almost unbearable. I didn't hurt. I just felt dragged about by the treadmill. Could. Not. Get. Going. But yesterday's 5 seemed normal again and my extremities hurt only about like they should. Things are looking up in the weather department and Daylight Saving begins this weekend. I'm looking forward to the evening sunshine.

Pamy, good choice on the marathon. If you're not ready you're not ready. I think once you get faster, you'll find it easier to sustain the distances over 5 miles. I highly recommend the treadmill 3x3s where you run as fast as you can for 3 minutes and recover for 3 minutes. They make you faster fast. We'll see how things go and if I haven't regained my sanity by then, maybe I'll run Utah with you.

And to all you non-blogging bloggers, if you're not posting because your runs are just so easy-peasy and you don't want to be a showoff you can go ahead and post. We don't mind. It's just more fun (for me) to write about how horrible it is. It's not really that horrible. Actually, it's more boring than anything. Why don't you liven things up for us? Post a picture. Write a poem. We can always appreciate more pocket sheep photographs.

'Tis the season

For pocket sheep!

It's true. It's lambing season, here in Oregon. I know because I saw some.



And they were playing like puppies!

Oh, also I ran. I think that eight miles is where you cross the line into long runs. Up to five miles is like going for a run. Six miles is a 10K. Seven miles? Eh, what's one more? Eight miles. Now you have something to prove. Anyway, it's done.

Here's the thing: I ran from work. Mostly because, you know, I had to work; it was my turn and all. Prior to my run it was raining so hard that your visibility was impaired. Then came the hail. Then came the sun! My run was more or less sunny and more or less dry. You can't ask for much more than that. The other cool thing was that I got to run on some of the same roads that I ran on as a kid, from about the ages of 10 to 15 (I lived at about the 4-mile mark) and so it was pleasant in a couple of different ways. Please understand that it was still a lot like work and I sure didn't care to bend down for anything when I was done, but my mind was well-occupied while I was out in it, despite the long, open stretches. I'm not running with a watch these days, but I'm guessing that this took me about an hour and twenty minutes. You can check my route below.

P.S.
I hope to keep seeing some Pamy posts from time to time.

There has been a change in plan

I am not quitting. Don't freak out. A marathon I said I would run, and a marathon I shall, so hang onto your invectives.

However, after nearly two weeks of pulmonary malfunction, I am still not 100%. In fact, yesterday I went to help some folks move and after a couple truckloads, I started feeling pretty terrible; this morning I woke up hacking again. So. I think I must needs adopt a Plan B.

I think it would be more feasible for me to run the Logan, UT marathon in September. Give myself the spring to get a nice solid training base and get a little more, well, fit. Then I can train this summer and run the biggie on Spetember 20.

That being said, I have grown fond of you bitches, and I have indulged many a fantasy about road trips to Oregon during my (now seemingly few) miles on the pavement. I dreamed and schemed and hell if I'm not gonna go. So I was thinking, what if I made my goal to run half of the thing and then just walk the rest? I know I can train for 13.1 miles before May 31, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I'd have to have a gun to my head to be able to pull out 26.2. None of y'all have guns, right?

So that's my new plan. It feels like a nice cozy little plan, and probably more appropriate for me (given my initial fitness level as evidenced by my ever-bitchworthy pace) even if I had not been stricken down with the plague.

So can we still be friends?

Fiver

Dear Bitches,

We should go for a run this week. The main reason is because I'm attending a class in Wilsonville, OR all week and so, what the heck, right? Oh, you can bring K-Fed if'n y'ant to. She seems cool.
Best regards,
Mike

Not the best run ever :(

No snow.
No bridge.
No Chelsea pier.
No Hudson.
No coach.
No pot pie and beer.
This one was just a run.

Best. Run. EVER.

Thanks coach :)

how anger makes you faster

I don't know what it is but I've pretty much converted to a treadmill runner in the last two weeks. I think I've run outside only two out of eight runs in that time. Yeah, it's cold but that only matters for about a block. And now it's snowing again, a lot this time, and that could matter a lot. But I just get used to the in-out-done of the gym. No coming back to work to collect my stuff, no traffic lights, no helicopter exhaust. Then again, out on the trail you don't have to deal with any RUDE BITCHES except Michelle, if you're lucky enough to have her company.

So anyone who's ever belonged to a gym has a passing familiarity with the cardio signup. You sign up for a half hour slot on a specific machine and then when your time comes, you get the machine. Right? So I sign up for a treadmill, number 3 to be exact, because I like that one. It doesn't squeak or rock. You can see your feet reflected in the window. It's not on the end. It's not directly in view of the creepy dude in the office across the street who likes to watch the girls on the treadmills. And I sign up for a 7:30 spot because that is the first time-slot available even though I got to the gym at 6:15. It's these damn membership drives. Bring a friend! Such is life.

So at 6:15 I take the stupid "dance class" with the lunatic Latina sexpot who makes us all gyrate like strippers and pretends that it's salsa. At 7:00 I do a round of weight machines. At 7:30, I get a drink of water, stretch and wait for #3 to vacate. She doesn't. At 7:35, I hop onto the broken treadmill next to her (maybe if enough people join this week they'll fix it) and I ask her if she's almost done. She lifts up her magazine to check the digital readout and says "I still have one more mile." And I say, nicely, reasonably, "There's a sign up for the machines." And she looks at me like I'm crazy and says, "Can't you use one of those?" It's true there are three other treadmills empty at the moment, though only one of them is unassigned on the sheet. "I'm sort of attached to this one," I say. "Well," she huffs, sneering, "it's gonna be like five more minutes."

What is that? I understand wanting to finish your run, and that's why I didn't bother you until 7:35. And could I use another treadmill? Sure. And of course I do, because it's already 7:40 and I'd like to eat dinner at some point. But there's a signup sheet for a reason and the reason is that IT"S NOT YOUR @#!#@!# TREADMILL. And the considerate thing to do in such a situation would be for YOU to get on a different machine.

Okay, sorry. I'm done. That's not a flattering picture of myself I just painted. But I can be petty and small. And that's why I ran two 8:30s followed by a 9:30. Which is pretty much like the wind, for me.

4 on the 'mill

Why? Good question. I mean is was bright and dry today; warm in the sun. It was still daylight when I left work. It would have been a nice evening for a run. And yet I chose to 'mill it. I think because it's harder to dog it on the 'mill. You can set a pace and then make yourself stick to it. It's easy, especially when running by yourself, to settle into the same old jog-along shuffle routine. Intervals keep things interesting, but, again with the discipline.

One nice thing about where I live is that there's a world-class training trail about a half-mile from my house (Track Town, USA!). The Adidas running trail is covered in bark. There's a 1600 meter (1 mile, for us Amuricans) lighted loop and a partially integrated 1000 meter loop marked in 100 meter intervals. I'll just say that it's awesome. 3:00 x 3:00s and :40/:20s are a piece of cake and progress is easy to measure, but I digress.

I chose a treadmill tonight because I wanted to push it, just a little, and this seemed like the best and easiest way under the circumstances. I'm at that point where a little shove is necessary in order to get over that hump and, believe me, I want to be on the other side. Regardless, I ground out four 8:00s. It was work, but not misery - and I did it. I had the luxury of time which allowed for the follow-up of some long stretches, which means that I'll get to run again next time.

How's everyone else (who's not being consumed) coming along?

Consumption junction, what's your function?

I'm the first victim of the seasonal changes. I am sick as a dog with what appears to be consumption. It's unfortunate, I am bored as hell, and it is a good reminder that running is a more pleasant physical experience than some of the other possibilities. I am hoping for a quick recovery with minimal losses of what little cardiovascular, musculoskeletal advances I had made.

When I woke up yesterday, clearly in the early throes of lungular revolt, I froggily proclaimed to Ryan that if I had traded in my marathon for brownies I would, in fact, kill myself. So, eat your fruits and veggies. That way, when you get sick, it won't seem like a legitimate excuse for suicide.

Lithe rather than bulky

That is my fitness goal, despite the fact that my genes generally tip me toward the latter. To be fit and physically capable, that's what motivates me. When training, my mind always goes to a portion of a favorite passage from 'The Pugilist at Rest' by Thom Jones. The passage in its entirety is highly recommended reading as it ponders more philosophically, particularly in the final paragraph, but my point is made below:

"Perhaps it is Theogenes who is depicted in the famous Roman statue (based on the Greek original) of "The Pugilist at Rest."...The statue depicts a muscular athlete approaching his middle age. He has a thick beard and a full head of curly hair. In addition to the telltale broken nose and cauliflower ears of a boxer, the pugilist has the slanted, drooping brows that bespeak torn nerves. Also, the forehead is piled with scar tissue. As may be expected, the pugilist has the musculature of a fighter. His neck and trapezius muscles are well developed. His shoulders are enormous; his chest is thick and flat, without the bulging pectorals of the bodybuilder. His back, oblique and abdominal muscles are highly pronounced, and he has that greatest asset of the modern boxer - sturdy legs. The arms are large, particularly the forearms, which are reinforced with the leather wrappings of the cestus. It is the body of a small heavyweight - lithe rather than bulky, but by no means lacking in power: a Jack Johnson or a Dempsey, say. If you see the authentic statue at the Terme Museum, in Rome, you will see that the seated boxer is really not much more than a light-heavyweight...The important thing is that he was perfectly proportioned."

Kind of makes you want to get going, doesn't it?

And then one day

He looked up and he noticed that it was 6:00 p.m. and it was still daylight. It caught him off guard, because he hadn't really been paying attention since about Halloween, but it made his heart lighten just a little and then his brain started to smile and he started his run, for the first time in a long time, being able to distinguish so much more than just headlights. And there were other people out, too, and they were running and walking their dogs and enjoying the additional daylight. The broken sidewalk and the encroaching cars at the business driveways and various sidestreets were less dangerous. It actually felt good just to be outside. The air tasted different and felt warmer in his lungs and he knew that the training had just gotten a little bit easier, even as it was about to get just a little bit harder. He knew that the long hours of running still ahead would be bearable, given the fact that the days would lengthen in cogress with the training requirements. His mind began to wander a bit and then, at 18th and Patterson, he realized that he was bouncing - almost imperceptibly, perhaps - but nonetheless bouncing up and down. He was not bent over with his hands on his knees, waiting for the light to change, he was actually jogging in place. He rounded another corner and trotted on toward home.

hangover

I just ran my 6 from last week. The weekend just didn't work out for me this time. I woke up disproportionately hungover (or so I thought) on Saturday and the blinding headache just never left. I didn't leave the house all weekend.

The 6, she was ok. There were lots of (fair weather) runners out and it was 60 weird and humid degrees. I thought it would pour rain on me, but it didn't. I kind of get a kick out of running in ridiculous weather, especially if it starts when you're already running. Torrential rains, 50 mph winds, snow. It just makes it feel that much more worth doing. Look! I'm running in this! Why would I do that if I weren't awesome? I didn't feel that awesome today, but I finished. And next week I get to run with Mike. Yippee! We'll be sure to post a picture of how cute we are so you can all puke.

There's an old joke that says

..."I used to stretch for two minutes and play for 20. Now I stretch for 20 and play for two." Yeah? Well, it's no joke. This is not self-deprecation. I don't like it, but it happens to be a matter of fact. For me. Regardless, I started gymming it this week. It had gotten to that point: No putting it off any longer. Start doing the stuff if you think that you want to keep doing the other stuff. The end.

So I started out light, you know? As previously posted, I've been here before; I know the deal. I want to walk. Being able to straighten my arm in order to reach for something comes in handy, too. So I took it nice an easy. Wow! Had it really been that long? Guess so. You have to be careful, because it feels really good your first time back. Then it hurts like a mamma-jamma. Then you have to go back in order to show your muscles who's boss. Then you start to feel stronger, leaner, more agile. Then it gets good and you start to actually feel physically capable. Your pants get loose. It feeds itself and becomes a way of life. I can see that far, but today I'm left to look forward to the next workout and chant: come on muscle memory! And then like the guy on the G train: Any day now!

Apparently...

...I have the biomechanics of a marionette.

It's true. I can't just run. It doesn't work that way. For me. Any more. Seriously, I'm somehow unable to work the muscles necessary for running by simply running. I know. I don't get it either. But I do know that if I only run, then it won't be long before things start hurting...like my hips and my knees and my shins and my feet. And if I ignore it, then these things start to REALLY hurt. Eventually, I will develop a training-ending pain of some sort. I know from experience because I don't want it to be true. I focus on my form and visualize the necessary muscles doing their respective jobs. I suppose it's possible that my form is as poor as my visualization techniques, but the pain remains in either case.

Mostly, it's that little muscle just above and slightly to the inside of your kneecap. I've come to understand that it's kind of an important one. However, that little son-of-a-bitch will slowly atrophy into uselessness by running alone and so I resort to cross-training. Oh, and stretching. Believe me, the only thing I hate more than stretching is how I feel if I attempt to run and don't stretch. And it works. For me. Pamy, I thought that you might appreciate this. Anyway, these are the things which I must do if I want to run. I've come to accept it as just part of the deal.

I guess that the trick here is to try to share what I know - or what I think I know - about what works for me without sounding like a horse's ass. I'm trying. 'Cause I'm old, too. Not as old as Richard, mind you (thanks for being there for me, Richard), but not too far behind him, either. If the good Lord is willing, then I will be in four short years. And I sincerely hope to still be running, should I make it.

More bananas! More water!

So I ran six miles today. And then I've walked two miles to my favorite coffeeshop. Now I type. Presumably, I'll walk two miles to home when I'm done. I used to do a lot more walking, proud of my pedestrianism, but I've been a slacky head of late. It felt good. I could feel all of the muscles in my legs. I really should do it more. It's not hard.

Anyway, I sit and type and contemplate the things that might enable the, so far, elusive runner's high. Maybe I should pay more attention to my cravings and consume more potassium, H2O, iron, calcium and protein. It's true, I've had some strange pangs of late. Oh, and stop eating so damn much! I feel like I'm going to puke from indigestion every time I run.

Something's gotta give. Maybe it's my diet and maybe it's that...

Still in it

I've completed week #2. I did all the stuff. It took six days, but as we know, six days does not a week make. Yes, appropo of nothing, but fun just the same. Anyway, I shuffled my six miles today and it was ok. I'm glad that I did it. It started out cloudy and cold but dry this morning. By afternoon, it had cleared to that oh-so-welcome February sunshine; glaring and bright with hard shadows, but it probably didn't get above 50. Good enough for a good sweat, but not exactly springtime.

See below:

So, I'm in it, of course, but it still doesn't feel good. Hey, I don't mean to complain, mostly because I don't want to bring anyone down but I'm just getting through it. I've yet to hit that stride, relax, get and feel all loose-jointed and let my mind just let go to where you actually feel like you could run forever. It's not happening. But it will. I've been here before and I know that it will come. I was just hoping that it would be here by now.

None of that matters though, because I will be running my seven miles next Saturday in Brooktown, USA! Eat your hearts out :)

Slacky head

so i didn't run today because my knees hurt pretty bad, meaning i missed one of the three milers this week.

if anyone would like to either affirm that this was wise or hurl insults and tell me i may as well quit now (paddy ass!!!) they are welcome to do so.

you guys need to start posting again so i dont feel so lonesome.

Fun!

Anyone who is a childless housewife, particularly anyone who is an insomniac childless housewife, might enjoy this. I found the part about growing more microscopic capillaries was particularly inspiring.

I jogged six miles today in a 1.5 mile loop around a park. I almost made it a three-miler, but decided to just plow through, and my recompense was seeing a couple skipping down the trail, each holding one of their toddler's hands, swinging the kid and laughing. And, since the snow made it all the darlinger, I hated it less. Also I passed them. So I am faster than a skipping couple toting a toddler. At least I am faster than someone.

Speaking of faster, some military-looking guy passed me twice, which is kind of embarrassing on a 1.5 mile trail. Getting passed once, par for the course. Getting passed twice you have to consciously shake off.

Rah!

4 am is a great time to blog. so shut up.

here is the list erin mentioned, team. i recommend extra-long list making as a fun exercise, mainly because it's hard to come up with a hundred reasons to do anything, even things that seem like they lend themselves to profuse numbers of good reasons.

like eating right, for example.
1. feel better
2. look better
3. possibly not have a debilitating disease when i am sixty five
4. um...um...

see? fun! give it a try!

and, for heaven's sake, post it here so we can read it, not on your other blog, even if you have no material for your other blog because your brain is too consumed with the scope of its own insanity to think of anything clever to amuse your faithful blog-reading mom.

tug of war

I can suffer the time on the treadmill only if I can lose myself in limerick-writing mode and stare at my feet in the window. “Hey, that chick in the window is still running! You better not quit! Now what rhymes with salivate?” But yesterday I occupied myself with your predicament, Amy.

I think that people who have high expectations for themselves, combined with occasionally flagging confidence, (me, for example, and maybe you) can easily end up in bed -- miserable, death-wishy and inert at the possibility of less than perfect achievement.

And I think for me, this tends to happen in between having said I will do a thing, and really believing that I can do the thing. It’s a strange tug-of-war between confidence and doubt, because often the confidence ropes you into something HUGE that your doubt later decides is STUPID. But if you were realy stupid and lazy, then you would just be stupid and lazy and you wouldn’t have said you would do this hard thing. You also probably wouldn’t be in bed, depressed. I suspect that happens because you know you can do it. (There’s that mean old confidence, kicking you when you’re down.) But frankly you can’t understand why when that’s the case, you’re not doing it. Loser. (← doubt again)

Anyway I think the solution that your hubbie suggests is a good one. Because you don’t have to run a marathon that way. You only have to run sixteen times. It’s like giving up not running for Lent or something. And success breeds success in these things. However, I do think that after a month of success, you should commit to the marathon, and I think you’ll be able to. Because with enough mental practice and the necessary physical conditioning, the marathon is just one more run that you do because that’s what the schedule says to do.

Until you’re done, of course, and then you’re all, “Look at me. I’m awesome.” And if you’re like me, that will soon give way to, “Eh, it’s not that hard. Anyone could do it.” And then it’s three years later and you find yourself training for another stupid marathon to remind yourself that actually it’s really fucking hard. So I guess what I’m saying is, you can let the doubt tell you that you aren’t that awesome, but you should wait until you’ve proven to lots of other people that you are. Because they’ll remember, even when you don’t.

So that’s my (twenty six point) two cents. Sorry it’s so long. Not very bloggy. By the way, I love your list, Amy. You should cross-post it here so everyone can see.

Despite my complaining, I’ve been keeping to the schedge. (Pronounced skedge, unless you’re a Brit, govenuh.) I printed it out and taped it to my computer, and after each run I put a nice fat sharpie X through the number. It’s starting to look like progress. I hope everyone is feeling capable this week, because you are my pretties, you are. And around the end of week 2 is when I always start to feel a little bit more taut and athletic. I can’t wait.

Stupid snow is stupid.

Stupid treadmills are stupid too. Running is stupid.

Stupid.

The only way is up

Um. I have a little confession to make, which I am probably only making since Mike made it first and I think everyone still likes him...

I didn't run last week either.

In fact, I got slammed with the worst depression of my life. I missed church(this is a big deal for those of you who don't know me) because I was so sad, and I stayed home in bed . I have never stayed in bed due to being sad ever before. But my "you-suck-at-running-life-isn't-worth-living" voice was yelling so loud, I couldn't get a word in edgewise. I hope I can shake it, is all I'm saying. It's weird how your own brain will sabotage the hell out of you, when you were just trying to be nice to it.

Since I did the first two weeks of training, essentially, during the two weeks before the Actual Training began, I think I will, as you said, Mike, just jump in and hope for the best. My current plan, suggested by my concerned and very supportive spouse, is to commit (really, truly, genuinely) to the first month of training. Kind of the same brain game as telling yourself you just have to get to the end of the block, top of the hill, etc. when you actually have to run three more miles. So that's the plan for now. And I am anticipating unseasonably tolerable temperatures today (it was downright not freezing yesterday and melted most of the snowy ice death) so I will be running out in the elements. I am hoping for a good one.

In other news, my sister, upon hearing through the grapevine that my resolve was flagging before I even began training, approached me and asked if I would return her ipod, claiming that an average twenty year old does, in fact, require two ipods to make the day go by. I guess I'll have to figure out how to make the mp3 player on my phone play mp3's. Damn.

Carb Loading

Richard and I volunteered to pour beer at the annual KLCC microbrew festival which was held last night. Ostensibly, we're supporting public radio by donating our time. In reality, if you volunteer to pour beer for a happy crowd for 3 1/2 hours, then you get your glass for free. Pretty good deal, no? Well, we had the good fortune to be assigned to pour for the far and away hometown favorite, Ninkasi Brewing Co. If you're a Eugene SNOB (supporter of native Oregon beers), then you probably know Jamie and really like everything he makes. Ninkasi has been ubiquitous in Eugene establishments for most of the past 2 years, but every third person in line last night wanted to know when they were going to start bottling. You might be relieved to know that 'in about 3 weeks' is the blessed answer. Anyway, we performed our due diligence and then did our best to make the rounds, but since there were more than 150 beers, we kind of steered toward the unknown. Lesson? Beware: Chili beer could potentially ruin your appetite for more beer. I'm telling you, it was a close call.

Slipping Back In

I did my fiver yesterday. I won't kid ya, it was work. It hurt. I thought that I was in a pretty good position, training-wise, because I've been running more or less consistently, 3-5 miles, 2-3 times a week, since about August. Nothing serious and since I didn't have any fitness goals, I didn't really worry if I'd missed a week or two, and it usually felt pretty good so it was no big deal. In short, I thought I'd laid down a pretty good base.

But I confess, I ran three 8:00s on the treadmill two weeks ago and then hadn't done anything since. I don't really know where it came from, but I experienced a serial lack of motivation coinciding with the official start of training. Kind of bad timing, that. I did NOTHING all this week. Which can be difficult to recover from, given our schedule. But then...

For some unexplainable reason, I woke up at 5:30 yesterday morning. Not that I got up, but I was awake. And so feeling the combination of crushing guilt, a stirring of actual motivation and desire AND lacking anything better to do, I got up and committed my self to a five-mile run: you can't catch up, you can only jump in. And the being out in it wasn't even drudgery because it was a beautiful morning; like spring, really. It was sunny and mild, eventually reaching 60 blue-sky degrees in the afternoon. The running did hurt though. And in some unusual places, which I won't go into. But I think it was good. I think I needed it. The pain was its own kind of motivation insofar as, "see: you're really not in that great of shape, you really do need to take this seriously and do the stuff. Oh, and you should probably rearrange your schedule and do some other stuff, too, because I don't think that jogging alone is going to cut it."

Anyway, I hurt today, but in a good way. You know, that kind of pain that makes you just a little bit hungry for more? Well, it's like that. I'm not sure why, but it feels kind of good to know that I'm actually starting from square one. If I had to guess, I'd suppose that it's probably because it will be easier to measure progress. And I do like progress.

Beta Site?

I don't know, coach. What do you think?

Cheer Duty

"Running is the greatest metaphor for life, because you get out of it what you put into it. "
Oprah Winfrey

If you map your run in kilometers, it makes you feel like you've run further.

Rah! Rah! Rah!

the treadmill naysayer

So for all my big talk about the treadmill being not as good I ran my first official training miles on one. It was late, dark, raining, New York. I just didn't have the outdoors in me. And it was a horrible three miles. I don't know if my body is resisting cause it knows what I have planned for the next 16 weeks or what, but I hate hate hate running normal speed for three miles in the same place. I'm gonna try to save it for some speed work if I feel like it or in case the weather really gets desperate and dangerous, but otherwise it does not suit me. If it suits you, fine, good, whatever. Way better to run on the treadmill than not run. Michelle, I don't know if three days a week at longer distances is as good, but I trust that if you're cross-training and mentally prepared, you'll be fine that way for a few more weeks.

I'm not feeling that positive at the moment so if someone wants to take over cheer duty for the moment, feel free.

Garbage and treadmills

So I went on a lovely run along the Columbia River today. I got to see lots of geese (I guess that means spring is coming?) and two blue herons. I also saw trash everywhere. It was almost like the garbage trucks just dump their loads along the river after they pick it up from our houses. Okay, not that bad but you know what I mean. *sigh* With all the trash, you would have thought I would have seen some seagulls. Rant done...NOW!





So my run was a little further than the required 3 miles, but I didn't have a course with milage mapped out ahead of time and I saw a landmark in the distance, and decided to go for it. 4 runs may be hard for me to do in a week until the days start getting longer so I might be doing 3 longer runs for a few weeks instead of the prescibed 4. That okay Coach Erin?

Amy, Erin's advice about getting out to run instead of using a treadmill all the time is good, but if it is your only choice for now, there are just some things you can do to make your workout more like running in the great outdoors. If Christie Clark can win the US marathon trials by training almost solely on a treadmill, then so can we!

Just in case

So I was thinking if this whole marathon thing doesn't work out for whatever reason, maybe you guys would want to train for this wife-carrying competition instead.

Go Ahead, Have a Drink

After reading this article, the world became a much happier place. Next year, I say we run in Bordeaux......

"There are few sights more peculiar than a parade of 8,000 costumed marathoners sipping wine as they run 26.2 miles . But that's exactly what happens each September at the Medoc Marathon in Bordeaux, where the course winds through 59 of France's most prized vineyards and elegant châteaus. Its aid stations eschew sports drinks and instead offer up such local refreshments as Lafite Rothschild and pâté. Winners take home their weight in grand crus.While there aren't any U.S. marathons serving fine wines on the course, American runners aren't immune to the pleasures of the ancient grape. In fact, according to the American College of Sports Medicine (ACSM), serious recreational runners drink more alcohol than their sedentary counterparts. Even Olympian Deena Kastor enjoys a glass of red the night before big races--including her bronze-medal run in Athens last summer. This despite the fact that the ACSM also says that drinking alcohol before engaging in sports decreases strength, power, speed, muscular endurance, and cardiovascular endurance.But there's also mounting evidence that moderate alcohol consumption offers some real health benefits. Alcohol in moderation has been shown to increase the levels of "good" cholesterol in the bloodstream, preventing "bad" cholesterol from clogging arteries and causing heart attacks. It also relaxes the muscles in the arteries, which lowers blood pressure. Scientists have even shown that some alcoholic beverages help prevent osteoporosis and reduce the risk of Alzheimer's disease.Red wine drinkers in particular benefit. A Harvard Medical School study found that the cholesterol-fighting antioxidant resveratrol, present only in red wine, produces the same life-lengthening effects as calorie reduction. Other research has determined that red wine is full of flavonoids, which are antioxidants that lower the risk of heart disease. And scientists at the University of California-Davis have recently discovered plant compounds called saponins in wine that block the body's absorption of cholesterol. Nearly half the average daily intake of saponins is present in a single glass of red wine (white wine contains less), and the higher a wine's alcohol content, the more saponins it provides. And if you prefer hops to grapes, there's good news for you, too. British scientists have found that beer drinkers have 30 percent more vitamin B6 in their blood plasma, which prevents the buildup of a chemical that causes heart disease.But long-distance runners, of course, have to think about hydration and endurance. Are the benefits worth the risks? Maybe. New research suggests that alcohol is not as dehydrating as once thought. "Initially, alcohol can dehydrate you, but over the course of 24 hours, alcohol no longer has a dehydrating effect," says Nancy Clark, R.D., a sports nutritionist in Boston and author of Nancy Clark's Sports Nutrition Guidebook. Still, alcohol can produce up to a three-percent loss of body weight (in fluids) within four hours of consumption, which can have a negative impact on performance and even be dangerous when heat is a factor. Consequently, drinking alcohol in the hours just before a hard run or race is not a good idea. "But as long as runners who are accustomed to drinking wine are drinking extra water and taking in other carbohydrates," says Clark, "one glass of wine with dinner the night before a race doesn't concern me."

Continues....http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-242-302--7908-2-1X2-3,00.html

101 KICKS IN THE BUTT

Check out this page:
http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,ssssss6-238-267--11733-1-1X2X3-4,00.html
From the looks of #1, it appears that Erin already read this.

Richard, check out #12.

artichoke pizza; healthy alternative or devil in disguise?

Welcome K-Fed! glad to have you on board. Last night while watching the snow that had accumulated throughout the weekend slowly melt and run down the street, I decided it would be a great time to go for a run. After harrasing my lovely bride into going with me on her bike we bundled up and headed out the door. Felt pretty good right up to the point where I stepped in the new and improved chuck hole in the road thus soaking my foot for the remaining 4 miles (yes Mike, I used the "map your run" feature that you talked about). While I slogged my way up the hendricks park hill I couldnt help but think....why did I eat that last piece of artichoke pizza?

I'm in- I'm here- and I'm K Fed

I'm actually Kate (but K Fed brings to mind some funny imagery), Michelle knows me- so does Flood. I've been running off and on for awhile now. The farthest I've ever gone is around nine miles. I'm excited that Michelle and I got to 7 when we were aiming to run half that. Next time I get out there I'll probably die trying to run 2 miles- but hey, that's how it goes.

I look forward to sharing my tales of misery and accomplishments with y'all. Cheers to shelf-butts in the future.

See you soon

Ooohhh, Paaa-myyy...

Whither the Bomb?
That's right. I said 'whither'.
I mean, you can't be subtle with these things. Is she is or is she ain't?

hillwork.

Erin,
aside from going to see movies, drinks and a play with Mike(Lisa is strangly silent on this subject), The training is starting; I am up to 3ish mile runs at roughly 8.5 minute miles. I havent ran a long run in sometime and look to increase miles some time this week with a long run (barring any snow!) this weekend. Lisa and I are doing a snowshoe trip in two weeks and most of my workouts have been geared towards hill work. I am applying the slow and steady method!

T minus 7 days

I don't know what the T usually stands for but in this case it stands for training. And training starts next week. So far, we've made some good progress.

Self: Good job setting yourself up as some kind of Tony Robbins-type guru-coach, backing yourself into an irritatingly upbeat corner for the duration of the training. Which is gonna be awesome.

Amy: Nice work on getting your speed up. Shaving two minutes per mile is quite a gain in two weeks and I'm sure more will come. If you really feel that way about Melissa Manchester, I suggest you just keep it inside and learn how to hide your feelings.

Michelle: You might be getting carried away. 7 miles? We haven't even started yet. Or was that some kind of relay, like 3 1/2 for you and 3 1/2 for Kate? By the way, where is Kate? I put her in the stupid graphic, so she better sign on and introduce.

Mike: Way to get out there even when it's freezing cold. I don't know how you can run with whiskey in your stomach so that's pretty impressive too.

Richard: Aside from dating my boyfriend (movies? plays? drinks? what will your wife think?), I'm not sure how your running is going, but you probably don't want to hear my pep talks anyway.

Everyone has registered. That's the biggest hurdle. The training week starts on Monday, but you can run your runs whenever you want. I'm gonna shoot for a Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday schedule. You should take a day off before and after your long run, especially when they start to get really long. Treadmills are fine for short runs here and there, but getting out in the elements and actually propelling your body forward is what will simulate marathon conditions, so you'll want to do that as much as you can.

One more Conscripted Sucker makes 6

Kate and I ran today. She's in.

The run felt excellent and while I did not stoop as low as Micky D's, I am sucking down a chocolate hazelnut milkshake from Burgerville as I type. mmmmm.....mmmmm.....goodness.

Six and six and a half

Six is how many miles I treadmilled yesterday; six and a half is how many hours it will take me to finish the marathon at my current pace (on a treadmill). That's too many. However, I have increased my pace from fifteen minutes a mile to thirteen, and have increased my distance capacity from three miles to six, so I guess we are getting somewhere...albeit, slowly.

I watched the movie and loved it-thanks for the recommendation (orders), coachie. My favorite character, by a landslide, was the old guy who "does it for the t-shirt", probably because I relate to him most closely in terms of physical fitness, speed, and source of motivation [hubris]. I thought he was charming. Flood, I agree that watching the interactions with the Boston Marathon couple was uncomfortable and that they were distasteful. I loved Deena Kastor a lot because she kept making me cry. I was also charmed by Daniel Njenga, pretty sad when he didn't win, and delighted by the footage from Kenya, although it did make the think, "to hell with the marathon, I'm moving to Africa!". Leah Caille was annoying to me, partially because she said her six-year-old daughter was so supportive (not her daughter's six-year-old job, in my opinion) and also because she was a little melodramatic and weepy. I resolved to not allow any running events to incite melodrama or weepiness in me, so I guess that was something positive. And I liked the lady who was running for charity a lot. She seemed appropriately intimidated by the marathon, without being a drama queen. And I liked how she ran alone.

I'm glad we are not running some super-sized marathon like Chicago.

Feeding the machine

I have a McFession to make. And understand, I'm pretty much anti-fast food. It's not some big moral high ground or anything, it just never sounds good - probably because it isn't.

I didn't eat after my run. It was satisfying to feel my body metabolizing what it already had to work with. I liked feeling just a little bit hungry and maybe just a little bit light, if only in my mind. After about 3 hours though...I was hawngry.

So. Because it was about midnight and because I didn't really feel like paying $9 for a burger, I went to...you know. I got a big 'n tasty with cheese & large fries (no drink, please - soda is for suckers) for an unbelievably even amount of $5.

And I destroyed it!

I woke up craving spaghetti and meatballs.

Weird.

Friday

Yeah, I did the thing. Not because I had to - and it would have been easy not to - but very soon I'm going to have to, so I may as well get used to the idea of having to do the thing before I really do have to do it. Anyway it was short. 3-ish. But you know what? Toward the end, it actually started to feel kind of good. I mean, it was no jog of jubilation, like Erin experienced, but it was OK.

But the best part - the absolute near nirvana experience - came after the run (big surprise, right?). But seriously, instead of going inside, taking my post-run warm-up shot and hitting the stretches, I headed for the backyard. I haven't spent much time back there since the days got short and I mowed the lawn for the last time.

It was dry and crunchy and cold, where you exhale your CO2 like a locomotive and steam rises from your shoulders. I headed for the backyard and stretched out in the hammock. The canvas warmed to my body temperature in a second and it felt so good to just lie there, suspended, weightless; completely relaxed. I almost fell asleep inside of 2 minutes. Aaahhh...I hadn't done that since, like, September. I'm telling you, it's the best!

The Spirit of the Marathon

I guess the thing that spoke to me the most was when Dick Beardlsey said, and I'm paraphrasing here, that no matter how hard you've trained, no matter what kind of shape you're in, you never know what your body is going to do to you on race day. That's probably my greatest fear. I'm picturing 4 months of difficult, disciplined training and then on race day your shins go numb at about mile #3. That's the kind of stuff that I worry about. And so I'm just hoping that the spirit might move us all on May 31st.

Best Run Ever

I just had one of those runs that you come back to mentally over and over again. The kind that makes you go out and run even when you don't want to, in hopes of having that feeling again. The kind that you visualize on the ninth mile of an 18 mile run when you're starting to forget that this isn't torture, no, you love this. It is cold here. 32 and windy. But the sun is glorious over the Hudson and I have missed running in daylight.

On my way to the river path, a traffic cop hopped up and down with me while I waited for the light to change. I saw a woman biking with an empty tag-along, and then on my way back it was full of two-year-old. I saw some kids with skateboards trying to break into a fenced part of the pier. I saw a big-ass dog wearing a sweater. A guy in a rent-a-party truck yelled "lookin' good!" and gave me a thumbs up. I was looking good. I was looking awesome. Perhaps because I am awesome.

marathon spirits

I loved the movie and especially the sold-out theater full of runners. What a friendly and energetic bunch of freaks. Did it get you psyched for this marathon thing? I left there all "Woohoo! Marathon!" and then I bought some wine.

I thought it was interesting how the professional runners (Djenga/Kastor) seemed kind of normal and awesome and the competitive non-professionals (the passive/aggressive couple) seemed like jerks. At least their relationship was ugly to watch. And then the normal people - the old guy and the two first-timers. They were more my speed.

What did everyone think? Did it make you think you could do it? Whatever. You already know you can do it.

Maybe this year....

Daniel Njenga got 3rd place at the Chicago Marathon in 2007 too. Darn it, I really wanted him to win. Thanks for making me watch the movie, Flood. I feel inspired now.

This creepy 13 year old ran 50 miles. I'm just sayin'.

melissa manchester, tiger and the cold

Thank you for the warm reception! Erin, I wasnt sure I was going to do this either, right up to the point where I paid for the run! But as is so often the case, snap decisions made, blister on left foot results...or something like that. I will be attending the movie this evening and while I didnt run last night I did enjoy a frosty beverage that required complete concentration to quaff...(I may have exagarated the "complete concentration"). Mike, while looking at my 1/2 full beer glass I did notice the moon, and it was something to see! Also, I will take the advice on the tiger balm, does it come in five gallon tubs?

Wednesday

I went. It was cold. It's over. I'm glad.

I ran by a bank. It said 25 degrees. I don't know if you can trust a bank these days but that's what it said. I do know know this: every bit of water I saw on my way was frozen solid. Not icing over, mind you. Frozen. Solid. There wasn't much of it though; it's been clear, cold, sunny, bright and beautiful here all week - freezing the very moisture right out of the air. Still, you had to be careful.

On a more interesting topic, has anyone noticed the moon this week? Ohmygosh! It's been gorgeous: rising and setting huge and round and full - glowing low in the sky both morning and evening and carving a high arc across the night sky like the summer sun. It's startling. It catches me off guard sometimes and I stop and stare. I love it.

So. Everyone's seeing the movie tomorrow. Right? RIGHT?

Richards intro

Hello from Eugene,
This is my first attempt at "blogging" so please be patient all. I have taken up the Newport Marathon torch and because of my advancing age (pretty early to throw an age card but better to establish that right off the bat!) I am really looking forward to the advil, ben-gay and sauna's that are so often associated with a good run. But, Mike has assured me that this will be a fun, exciting and tremendously fulfilling endeavor....right?

Baby!

It's COLD outside!

OK, so maybe those of you who live in NEW YORK and UTAH don't really want to hear about it, but to those of us who reside out here in God's country, it's cold. Too damn cold to be running around outside after dark anyway.

At least it's dry.

Fortunately, I'm rarely inhibited by trivial notions like "common" sense (oh, there's a list) and so I cut the sleeves off of a sweatshirt, put it on as an extra layer and did the thing. You know, it hurt. Whatever. It's all good. I'm just hoping that I didn't catch this lungular frostbite I've been reading so much about.

Better take some more medicine just in case.

A Good One

I am due for a positive post and, luckily, my run today warrants one. Ok, so it was on a treadmill. But it was FUN! And I was faster than I thought (I will spare you the numbers, as you will think less of me...just consider it a morale victory)!

I think that I can credit the newly borrowed ipod to the day's success. I mean, how can you feel bad when Melissa Manchester hits the key change in the third verse of Don't Cry Out Loud? You can't. I was thinking that maybe Erin could just sing it over and over during the marathon, to keep our spirits up.

Between Melissa Manchester and Michael Jackson, I had a calm abdomen, a little spring in my step, and hope for the future. I didn't even have to distract myself with the Snoop Dogg show (which, interestingly, was on again. I guess it's a popular one). I ran three and a half miles, and I'm gonna do it again tomorrow morning.

running in the cold is totally fun

Unfortunately what I did tonight was more like a crookedy shuffle-hobble than a run. The looks on the faces of frigid New Yorkers when you blow past them is nice. And they're right. I'm crazy. But now that I'm getting feeling back in my legs, and the new-pant chafe is shifting from tingle to burn, I'm just not feeling that stoked on Winter.

There. I'm just like you. Whiny.

Why do you people have to complain all the time? And why's it so damn cold?

Bad Math, Nice Try

The weeks beginning:

1. February 4th
2. February 11th
3. February 18th
4. February 25th
5. March 3rd
6. March 10th
7. March 17th
8. March 24th
9. March 31st
10. April 7th
11. April 14th
12. April 21st
13. April 28th
14. May 5th
15. May 12th
16. May 19th
17. May 26th

Sorry, sugar. Months have at most 4 and 3/7ths weeks, which is "more like 4 and 1/2" than it is like 4, but in this case it still doesn't get you the right number of weeks.

• 4 and 1/7th (February)
• 4 and 3/7ths (March)
• 4 and 2/7ths (April)
• 4 and 3/7ths (May)

So that gives you what? 16 whole weeks and 9/7ths of a week for a total of 17 weeks and 2 days. But in fact it's less than that because training starts on a Monday and the race is on a Saturday. That's because the 1st three days of February should be subtracted. In other words, if you count days and divide by 7, you'll see. A valiant effort on your part. Commendable, really. But no, you can't wait another month.

Chicken and Waffles

I was writing the sixteen week countdown in my calendar (with marathon week as week sixteen, and working backward) and concluded that week one actually begins on February 18. If you count each month as having four weeks, sixteen weeks would begin four months before the day of the marathon (duh). BUT, since each month has more like four and a half weeks, the marathon training should actually start a bit later.

My final conclusion is that I must really be scared of this training if I am willing to engage my menial arithmetic skills to postpone it. Could someone double check? I have been known to get mixed up on these sorts of things. As I said, I'm not so great with numbers. If I am right, we still have a month before official training begins. I hope I am right.

Does anyone know why my entire abdomen might be seizing/cramping when I run? I hypothesized that it was induced by the fact that my gym plays Matchbox 20 on a regular basis (whose innards wouldn't seize?), but I just thought I would throw it out there in case anyone knows any good tricks (coach?). I am not talking about a little side stitch/intercostal muscle pinch here. I am talking about out-and-out visceral cries for mercy. Perhaps I should quit eating altogether.

In other news, I have, at least for the blizzardy moment, taken wholeheartedly to the treadmill. I found I was able to complete three miles easily (despite visceral mayhem) simply by following the subtitles on some show starring snoop dogg and, allegedly, his wife and children (I do not know if they were his real wife and children or not, but I prefer to think they were). He kept bitching at people to go get him roscoe's, and it was all quite amusing, but, unfortunately, resulted in an unfulfilled craving for fried chicken.

Am I still talking? Sorry. I'm just putting off going to the gym :)

Re: T Seeley's personal ponderings

How cool would THAT be? Um, I'm going to go with about an 11 on the cool-o-meter. Ponder until Thursday. Then see the movie. Then sign up. Then run a marathon with your daughter. Then we can all bask in the unparalleled coolness of it.

Admission

Been trotting on a treadmill. Don't hate me; it's cold. I know, I know. At least I have legs.

So, Ms. Flood, we are....

...conscripted suckers?

Excuses

Watch this, please:

What's the lesson here? That your excuses are boring. And having legs is awesome.

#2

Not much to tell. It was cold; probably near 30 degrees. I almost went to bed instead of going for a run. It was close. You can't tell from the map, but the first mile is up and over College Hill, which is formidable in both relative elevation and absolute grade. The north side is both longer and more steep than the south side. I've run it from both directions. Not that I'm either bitching or bragging. I'm just saying. At another time in my life it served alternately as both my personal demon and savior and I would run it both coming and going. But enough about all of that. I did it. It hurt. The whiskey helped. I think. No, it did. It totally did.

Now let's see if you can use the word both 5 times in a single post.

Plus one

You know that friend I mentioned earlier? Well, he claims to have registered. And with like almost no browbeating.

By way of partial introduction, Richard and I have worked, run, boxed, played soccer and hiked together for the better part of 10 years.

He's been invited, has the link and has been told the deal. We'll see if he chimes in.

Map this run, bitches!

So today I ran stairs for 25 minutes...



Well actually, I stood in one place in a hot smelly gym with lots of hot smelly people while I became hot, smelly, beet red and dripping in sweat on a stupid machine that looked like this and had one step that tipped forward:



Erin, I feel anger toward you right now; this is your fault. Okay, now that I have projected the blame onto someone else, I feel better.

What the...

Sinews and metal? I said that?

I was lying.

fine, i ran too.

I guess if I'm gonna go on about how not hard at all it is to run a marathon, I better start running, too. And weather.com was right. 35 does feel like 25. Fuuuuck. And not to be super positive about this, but I've been finding it fun and distracting to make up little chants for myself while I run. Seriously, trying to rhyme Cuisine of Pakistan (which is what I had for lunch, bad idea,) with something about how awesome I am can occupy my mind for miles. I think I may have to go multimedia and make a motivational video for you guys. Don't kill yourselves over how awful it is now. Cause it's gonna get worse. But it's gonna get better too. The point is to keep going out there until you can do it. Feed your bodies. Rest. Drink water. We'll get there. This is the first time I've run 5 miles at once since 2005. Amy, remember how you used to say you were sinews and metal? You still are. Go protein!

Spirit of the Marathon

A little cinematic inspiration is coming to a city near you. This full-length, award-winning, marathon documentary, featuring my running coach from the University of Oregon (by which I mean the guy who taught the 10K class that I dropped out of after 5 weeks cause my foot hurt and class was at 8 in the morning) is showing on January 24th in your city. Yes, I know where you live.

Go here and watch the trailer and get tickets. That is an assignment, from your coach, who is about to go running in the cold, along the Hudson River, wearing nothing but italics.

I went running. Sorta.

Upon inviting another friend to run this bad boy (I have been pretty into the idea of using the marathon to see every friend I've been missing for three years or more), she responded, "Apparently, if when you run you look more like a penguin than a gazelle, you are probably not biomechanically set up to be a runner."

How true. Yesterday I, too, took to the streets. And it weren't pretty. I met the bomb at the park and we 'ran' around the circumfrential trail, with occasionally desperately needed stints of walking. All in all, it was 3- miles worth and totally flat. I think that despite the relatively slow pace the bomb was able to maintain, she is not nearly so much of a penguin as I. At the start of the run, my ankle hurt real bad. I stopped, shook, and started again only to find that now it was my left tarsal bones that were in defiance. Another shake and I was on my way. The protests were silenced until after the run was over and my left knee and hip advised me that they had been displeased as well. Perhaps it's the new shoes. Either way, last night I didn't sleep well because I kept having dreams where a bad guys was coming to get me and I couldn't run. Yikes. I better get some motivational reading, and quick. And maybe some protein shakes (Ryan, my wife, who has been a novice bodybuilder for some time, advised me that adding a run to our normal routine at the gym may be causing a bodily freak-out called overtraining, and that he has found protein shakes are miracle workers). We shall see. The bomb and I are scheduled for another trot today at one thirty, so hopefully despite the poor night's sleep, I will be able to champ it.

Come to think of it, perhaps I should try booze instead of protein shakes. Seems like it's worked for you guys.

Taking it to the streets

It's like this:

It's 8:20 p.m. It's been dark in Eugene, OR for 3 1/2 hours. You're just getting home. It would be easy to crack open a buzzsaw brown and settle into your evening, such as it is. You really don't feel like it, but you want to show people what you're made of. As everyone knows, this could be done by either A.) running more than anyone else or 2.) not running at all until race day. Decisions, decisions.

Fortunately, you've spent the last 57 minutes parked in your driveway and talking to Coach Errin. Also, you know that you will feel better when you're done. The pendulum is carving a dangerous arc and it's up to you to reverse it's trajectory. You know this, but just 12 oz. of Deschutes seasonal could render all of that preposterous. Time to suck it up.

Sweats, shoes, knit cap, gloves. A few short and painful but unfortunately necessary stretches. 1 oz. whiskey. Go. Ease into it. It's OK.

It was raining hard a while ago, but the streets are just wet now. It's somewhere near 40 degrees. The clouds and new moon make it hard to see the numerous puddles along your route. Your joints stop hurting after the first 1/2 mile. The cold air burns your lungs - in not an entirely unpleasant way - and makes you cough, if you breathe deep enough. You start to get warm and feel loose. You notice that it's actually pleasant out.

Running north on Hilyard, you're tempted to stretch it out and really make this one count. You can actually feel the muscles in your legs, chest and the small of your back; its been a while. It feels good. You decide, instead, to stick to the plan. Turn left on 18th. Keep it short. It's a long road. No need to overdo it. There will plenty of time for that later.

Anyway, it's not much, but it's 3+ miles. On the ground. Old school, yo. Check it.

Tattoo on my forehead

Yea, the title has nothing to do with the content.

The page I use is http://www.gmap-pedometer.com/, but it looks much like the page that Ms. Flood uses.


So, just in case you are wondering, I am not quite the alcoholic I made myself out to be in my last blog (she says as she drinks a beer). I do make beer, but my New Years resolution was to drink less and exercise more which is why I am running this marathon. So now I just drink the brewski on those exceptionally crappy work days where I need the alcoholic crutch to keep from tearing out my hair and running down the street screaming...wait, what a good way to get in shape!


My accomplishments for the weekend. I did nothing active on Saturday but on Sunday I ran most of 5.5 miles. I say 'most of' cuz I am embarrassed to say that I walked some. My excuse....well, where to start, I have about 80. One of which is the beer belly of course, let me know if you want the other 79. I am working on getting another runner on board who lives in Portland and can train with me. Of course it will be nothing like training with Flood (but only because Kate is nice to me).


I did join a gym today so that I can train alone during these cold dark months without having to run through my ghetto neighborhood where drive-by shootings occur often, including at the bus stop right next to my house. Now if I actually go to the gym, it will make the huge membership fee worth it.


Glad to see you are committed, Mr. Messenger. We'll run next time I am in Eugene, which will be never.

Hope everyone had a shiny happy good weekend.

it is done

I'm paid. Better get shuf-shuf-shuffling.

Sheesh

First I'm supposed to get a tattoo, now you want me to go running too? C'mon, coach, have a heart! Ok, ok. So I'm scheduled for my first official run (more accurately, my first movement through space of any kind) today with the bomb. I'm excited. I think. And I did set the marathon training schedule as the backdrop on my computer, which means I will see it 8,934,534 times a day. But I'll be damned if I'm gonna write a song.

The Schedule

I posted the training schedule as an image at the bottom of the page. It will always appear at the bottom of the page but you may want to put it on your desktop, in your car, on your mirror, under your pillow or have it tattooed on your left arm as well. That's up to you. As you can see, it's really not that bad. Look at all those weeks chock-full of three-milers. That's nothing. That's a joke. You were made for this.

In order to plan, brag about and share your runs both awesome and terrible, you can use this site. It's great for figuring out mileage before or after you run and you can post the little maps to the blog. Michelle, don't you use a different site for this same purpose? You sent me a link once but I can't remember. Post it up. Maybe it's better.

See this crazy-ass walk I took on Saturday? Cuckoo!

Does everyone have good shoes? Has everyone started running a little? Did you tell your friends and family that you're running a marathon? Tell them. Commit. Write a song about it. I did.

greetings all around

Please excuse my tardiness, but I'm here. I'm in.

Pamy, nice to meet you. I've seen some of your work at Glamorous Life. I'm expecting big things from you. I'm guessing that we'll hear from the bomb when/if you get her properly roped in. I have a friend I've thought about inviting as well.

Bitches, a pleasure as always. I'd be curious to hear more about that beer.

A little bit about me:
OK, never mind. But I will tell you this - I ran a half-marathon. Once. Well, no. I mean, like Pamy, I didn't actually RUN. It's just what they say. I'm speaking in the vernacular. It's Track Town parlance. Try and keep up. ANyway. The point is, when I was done, I could have no more turn around and run that course backward than fly to the moon. SO. I'm ready for the program. I'm kind of curious to see what coach e-flood thinks she can do in order to keep me from failing at the mid-point. And I'm looking forward to every bit of it.

I am now financially committed

In the span of one hour I dropped two hundred bucks, so I'm in. I mean, really in. If I try to get out, my husband will be cranky about those two hundred bucks, and so will I. So there you go. I registered, pasta dinner and all, per coach's orders, and bought new shoes and insoles. Hopefully they will transform me into a 105 lb. woman with springs for heels.

Also, I invited a particularly delightful friend to join our ranks. She seemed thrilled, being a spontaneous and adventurous sort, so don't be surprised if an Ashley Sanders shows up on this blog. She's the bomb, you'll love her.

I have declared war on my big fat arse...

...and declared myself a marathoner. I am registered and resigned to do it now. I am glad to see that I have a few more weeks to continue my mostly sedentary life style before training begins. I will write a witty introduction later. For now, I am going to sign off so I can focus my whole being on the beer I am about to chug. Keg stands anyone?

Nice to meet you Amy!

So Erin Wants Me to Run a Marathon

Well, it's ok. She's allowed to be the inspiration for my first, since I was the inspiration for hers (even though I did not run it myself, due to straight bailing). I would tend to take issue with our web address, runyourassoff, because, let's face it, with an ass like mine, it ain't going off or anywhere else. Everything else about the blog works for me though. Thanks, Flood. You're a lamb.

So, Michael and Michelle, you don't know me, and you may never. I would like to say we can all get acquainted during our several hours of running together in May, but I am pretty sure I am going to be in the "dust-eating"category. I can run for thirty minutes, all right, but I only get two miles run (perhaps 'run' isn't the most precise word) during that time. So it may be a six hour trot for me. Perhaps my marathon would be more aptly placed in the slow-ass category than the run-your-ass-off category.

I hope I do get to know you, though, because, in my experience, Flood has impeccable taste. I am prepared to be charmed, and you should be too. I am no runner, but I like to do serious stuff (like get married; that was pretty serious). I have a silly blog that you can read if you want to get to know me better, but, beware, it's good and silly.

I am glad this is happening. As a stay at home mom with no kids, my life could use a little adventure, but I can't afford any of the more traditional types. This will be great. Let's go do the hardest thing we can think of together.

Nice to meet you.

So you wanna run a marathon?

Or you don't really want to, but you're going to do it anyway cause I called you names and made you feel like a sissy? Here's how it works.

There's this book that I've used, and so Michelle by extension has used it, because we ran Newport together in 2005(?). Amy, you've got the book. Mike, you've heard me rave about it. It's called The Non-Runner's Marathon Trainer. If you want the book, it's here.

We're gonna use their schedule cause it works and it doesn't require you to quit your job to run three times a day and it only takes 16 weeks to get there. The book puts a lot of focus on mental preparation. You can be an utterly average runner and use your super awesome mental powers to do the marathon. As an utterly average runner myself, I can attest to this. You do have to train though. And that will be the focus of this blog.

Training will begin on February 4th. That's 3 and a half weeks to lay down the base and then 16 + 1 weeks till the big day. The extra week is for injury recovery, illness or unforeseen whathaveyou during your training. That's not a lot of wiggle room, but if you have too much it might psych you out.

I'm sure we're all at different levels of readiness but we're all gonna run this marathon. We don't have to run it side-by-side, but training as a (virtual) group and posting our runs should help us keep our momentum. To start the training, you must be able to run continuously for 30 minutes. You don't have to be able to enjoy doing that, but you have to be able to do it. Amy, you know how to get there and I have no doubt you can do it in three and a half weeks.

For the blog, I'll email everyone an invitation and we can record our runs, comments, complaints, injuries, inspirational tidbits, and toward the end of the training, our travel itineraries and plans for accommodations in sunny Newport, Oregon.

Let's all register today. Can we all register today? I'm gonna do it at 5PM Eastern time. Don't delay or see how it goes. That's an excuse not to do it. Spend the 50 bucks. Declare yourself a marathoner. Tell everyone you know that you're doing it. This is gonna be awesome.